Jeff came home yesterday, right on schedule, from Round Three of chemo. Amazing! Following his triumphant return, Stella slept surprisingly well, Lydia did alright, and after we dropped Stella off at school this morning, Jeff felt well enough to take Emily out for a farewell breakfast at the end of her visit. Come back again soon Emi!
Overall, it seems that Jeff is doing pretty well, but today he is tired. The neuropathy continues. He also has what he describes as a "film" coating his mouth. It's not a taste exactly, but makes things taste "off." That sounds unpleasant. But he was a rockstar for this treatment session even though all this time in the hospital is starting to grate on his nerves and get really old.
I'm "stealing a moment" to write this update because Jeff and Lydia are napping in the other room. Woohoo! I also thought I'd talk about valuing the present for a second - or a moment, if you will. I've been thinking about how to enjoy things more, or make the best out of some awful moments. In chief, I realized that bedtime with Stella, which is often a thorn in my side, goes much better if I don't try to rush it, even when she is driving me nuts. This isn't always feasible, like when Lydia is fussing and will not be soothed by anyone but me. But, most of the time, if I just slow down, I am happier, she is happier, and the world is a happier place.
So, I'm refocusing on living in the present. This is one of those times in life when there are a lot of unknowns and it is not easy to plan with certainty for the future. But - news flash - that is actually true for all of us all the time. It's uncomfortable to realize that the tomorrow you expect is never a sure bet, but it's true whether you have a family member with lymphoma or not.
As a planner, I will plan as much as I can - it's a compulsion - but I am learning to just let today be today. I can't change the past and can't control what comes next, so I'll enjoy Stella's silly skipping, Lydia's new laughter, and these quiet times. [Video of Lydia chuckling to come soon...]